The Imperfect Graduate ( My Early Apology)

I saw this post on Gabriel Esu’z Blog…he called it Gabriel The Failure…i totally disagree coz hes one o’ the best photographers in Nigeria ( no washin’) and a great mentor/motivator!!

*Climbs the Podium with Tears in eyes*

*coughs*

I failed. Yes! I Did.

Everyday I cry knowing that I am not Graduating with my peers. All the Congratulatory messages coming to me from those who don’t know my predicament just makes it worse. Such is Life.

I’m not gonna be like a typical Nigerian and blame the Devil for this. it was totally my fault. My Graduation is in the next two days…but i live to graduate another day.

The Look in my parents eyes is priceless. After inviting the whole village to attend, what are they gonna say? How would they explain this to all those people?

The Look in the eyes of my Friends. I hate this one. That look of “Gabriel you’re better than this”or “Why would you let this happen to you”. They hate me so much for what I did to myself.

*wipes tears*

I don’t have a problem with the shame that comes with it. I never have problem with shame. My only problem is the reactions from the ones that care about me. The thoughts of what life would have been like if I was Graduating haunt me too.

Friends ask me questions like “Gabriel what happened? You used to be good at all this school stuff”

Im faced with the trauma of having to explain this to people day after day, thats why i decided to put this on my blog.

To those I have disappointed, Im sorry for not meeting your expectations.

To those who Love and Care about me, I pray you find it in your heart to forgive me.

To those who believe in me, I promise not to let you down again.

To those who have and will make fun of this situation, I pray you don’t go through the same.

And to my Parents and Family, no amount of apology will suffice but all I have to say is “don’t lose Faith in me”

In Conclusion *wipes tears*

Im packing what I have left of my Reputation, Dignity and Heart. I’m facing school again with all my might and all that I have in me. Let this Blog Post count as evidence and proof.

“CONGRATULATIONS TO THOSE OF YOU THAT MADE IT. GOD BE WITH YOU EVERY STEP OF THE WAY”

*weeps*

See you at my 2nd Graduation.

Gabriel Esu

“It made me teary eyed abit…i still have a year left but ive always had this little feelin’ that not graduating might be my fate too….the thought has haunted me since 300lvl…People talkin’ behind my back or maybe in front sef…i hear them sayin’ -its only fashion she knows,olodo blogger…loool..( i might actually laff at that), i’m totally disappointed at u dero (something my grandma says dat makes me cry)

It makes me sad a times buh it also motivates me to do the other things im involved in better,i cant even check last semesters result,i wanted to drop out after it…it was soooooo flippin’ depressing!! I Pray a miracle happens sha-pray 4 me too….buh even if i dont graduate with my peers…I AM NOT A FAILURE!!!!i stayed till the end…i know alot of people that came in with me and got expelled,dropped out, even died!!!

So to those who aren’t graduating on friday…God still has a plan for you regardless!!!!Block your ears to the side-talk!!!”

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24 thoughts on “The Imperfect Graduate ( My Early Apology)

  1. LOL. I can totally relate to this… I went through all mehn. I didn’t even know I was going to spend an extra year. But I did. I’m thru now tho, almost, at least I’ve written the only paper that made me stay a year (my school is something else). The funny thing is, now I’m better for it. I did lots of stuffs when I was jobless and discovered amazing things about myself!! Now… I’m glad the whole thing happened!! Even thought its annoying when some people drops comment about how they thought I’m better than spending an extra year with how ‘brilliant’, ‘intelligent’ and ‘creative’ I am. *sigh*

  2. 😥 sadly I have this same fear…. I jus pray it doesn’t come true……I have a year left also….. This time I have to put in everything….if gabe can see this post….. I still have mad respect for you man…. Since when I was in100 level… When u were d CST week coordinator…. The respect is still there (Y)

  3. This hit very close to home for me
    But for the most part everything happens for a reason.graduating with your peers does not determine success neither does graduating a year or two after them mean failure. Look at it as a temporary setback and make the best use of it.. No pity parties, no tears..
    Everything happens for a reason.
    Remain Thankful to GOD always!

    Cheers!

  4. Gabriel..ur really strong.that’s admirÀble..I know this is cliche buh erry disappointment is a blessing..trust me I know.@dero..u have a year to tell erry1 ur a success.don’t waste it. Much love

  5. I think what we need to do is overcome that fear first, cos like job what he feared was what the Devil used against him! It happened to me too so, to win in this overcome that fear and when u say ur a success, work with that confidence. It makes all the difference..@DERO, we are grading together no worries 2013 BABY!

  6. To Gabriel… mehn… I believe you… Forget, You are my Hero… Mentor, motivator… My Grandpa,…. This is, for me, not a setback, more like a lil more time to polish the gold…. I’m faithful man… Your works inspire me… So don’t let them haters talk affect u… At Dero….. I sympathise with your sentiments… I totally agree, Gabriel iss one of the bestest guys and entrepreneurs i know… So Whether He grads this yr or not, he still better pass most of all those his mates that are graduating as nfassss…

  7. Dnt knw gabriel esu bt 4rm wat av seen nd hrd u are u a talented guy wit a future nd a hope……………nd abt d dissapointment frm ur loved ones, it wld vanish wen dey c u in d nxt few yrs…….mst of us graduating sef dnt av an idea on wat 2 do……..nd u re definatly nt a failure, definatly nt……nd u re nt IMPERFECT

  8. This was me 2 years ago. I studied a course I knew nothing about and instead of 3 years,I spent for years. Thank God for family cos I was paying internation student fees. I was rebuked and discuraged. Everyone thought I wuld graduate in 2010 but nah! I only summoned up courage to tell my mum a fdew weeks before school was to resume in 2010. I was even tired of exams at some point. The one I missed happened to be the final one. God pitied me I guess and the markers gave me a compensatory mark,so I didn’t go for a resit in summer. I’m glad to be a graduate now.Just back home in Nigeria waiting to serve. My advice,keep ur head up,pray and face ur studies squarely.

  9. Pingback: Spill-over | The Fashion Engineer

  10. Having just done something that was totally against my character, I can totally relate to how you felt with this post. It is so hard when something happens to you or you do something that makes the people who care about you, who believe in you have to pause. You dont want to see the look of disappointment, because you have your disappointment, regret and shame (in my case) to deal with…its tough….

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